Wednesday, 21 May 2008

25 today!

25 already, where did the past couple of years go?! Well the occasion has been marked by my lovely husband buying me some photo editing software and some photography books, so hopefully my pictures will improve! Here are my 3 pictures from last week, but very naughty of me, I haven't taken any this week! Whoops! I shall have lots of opportunities in the week coming though as I have a wedding on saturday, a week off work, and a visit to Cornwall all coming up. Can't wait!

The third picture is just round the corner from my house. We are so blessed to have somewhere so lovely so close really. I should take advantage of the fact and go walking and cycling more, but I'll put them on the to do list.

As for the car situation, I'm off to look at an Almera this morning. Have looked at a couple of cars but seen nothing yet.

Friday, 16 May 2008

Listen to your instincts

Lesson of the week, if you feel uneasy about something or your instinct tells you something isn't right then listen, as it may be more then just your instincts talking to you. I wish I had, I wanted a car, loved it, but felt really uneasy. Ignored the feeling as couldn't see anything wrong and bought the car anyway. 2 months later and I realise my instincts were right, leaving me out of pocket by quite a lot now. I don't have it in me to fight right now for full money back with some dodgy car dealer who is going to make it difficult ad claims there is nothing wrong, so taken a smaller amount of money and walked away. So now on to look for a car again, joy. This time if I feel uneasy though I won't buy the car!

As for last weeks photos I have taken some (honest gov), not as many as hoped due to the car situation, however I haven't got the camera with me today so will try and post them over the weekend and take a load more pictures too. You never know if I'm doing well I may get round a national trust property without any hiccups unlike the past 3 times! Car hunting first anyway.

Oh and as a complete aside to anything else can i rant about next doors cats destroying all my seedlings?! Well I can because it's my blog, but anyway, MY BIG TUBS OF SALAD LEAVES ARE NOT A BED FOR YOU YOU STUPID GINGER CAT!!!! At least it has left the carrots alone and all the others, but GRRR!

Please note that after this picture was taken I did go out and shoot said cat with the hosepipe.

Wednesday, 7 May 2008

As time flies by

So far only posted my art and photos, not really touched on the ttc and life in general bit, so a bit more about me and my journey so far.

It was 2 months yesterday since my dating scan where I found out I had a probable missed miscarriage. I ended up having an erpc 2 weeks later, at 13 weeks, as the baby had stopped developing at 6 weeks. It seems so long ago now, but also no time at all. It's one of those strange time things. I can't imagine being 20 weeks pregnant now, I'm not sure if I can imagine being 20 weeks pregnant at all.

It's 15 months since we started ttc and in that time lots of friends have started ttc, got pregnant, several have their babies already, and 2 family members have also miscarried. I'm starting to think it's time to let others know about what's going on with us as when I did miscarry I found that talking to my boss who had been through very similar helped a lot. It's one of those things that so often you don't know about when people miscarry, but it must feel so lonely if you don't know anyone who has been through similar. So I think maybe it's nearly time to go public.

Anyway enough waffle for now.

Oh and just editing to add a little rant. i thik I'm getting to the point where I feel ready to complain about this now. The people in the epau and gynae were lovely, however people in maternity are a completely different matter!

*I do not need to be told that losing my baby is God's will
*I do not need to be told I've basically had a miscarriage and then dumped back in the waiting room for an hour with lots of heavily pregnant people
*I do want you to read my chart!! I've just been told I've had a probable mmc and you stupid weighing woman are congratulating me and telling me how lucky I am??!!!
*I do want to be correctly informed, not told one thing by the doctor and something entirely different by the midwife and then left not knowing what the heck to do when things do start to happen naturally.
*I do not want you trying to pretend that things might be ok when we both know fine well that they probably won't. If I hadn't been so clued up I would of left thinking that it was most likely my baby would be ok, and that the mmc was just an off chance. I know my dates and when I got my +ve you idiotic doctor!!

And breath. Then copy and paste to the hospital with a few tweaks.

Tuesday, 6 May 2008

photos for this week

Hmm this weeks 3 pictures of the week. Not the most amazing ever but hey never mind. I did have another outing but got rained on and didn't really get much. I think I need to start not being embarrassed about getting my newly bought tripod out too. No point having it if I'm just going to carry it round in it's little bag feeling a bit silly. Anyway the first two were from wandering round a local country park one evening, and the last is my first attempt at a photo for this months challenge. The theme is contrast and I've got some great ideas, but no way of really making most of them become a reality. So if anyone has a chav or a tramp they could lend me I'd be most obliged

Friday, 2 May 2008

Previous painting stuff

Right here is my current work in progress, ok I admit he doesn't look entirely like himself, but not bad at a first attempt of painting an actual person. He isn't quite finished yet, but not entirely sure what else it is I need to do.

As for my old paintings here are a few that are up in my house at the moment. I do have others pictures, but these are the ones on the walls, so took some quick snaps on my phone before coming to work.